How to text and drive

A humor post outlining how one can text and drive at the same time. The post has sarcastic statements to discourage text & drive.
We are extremely sorry to say that we cannot text and drive anymore. It really surprises us why state governments do not realize the necessity of being tech-savvy in everyday life. Texting and driving (at the same time) is one of the most tech-savvy activities that has driven millennials as well as modern adults of this century. Texas was, so far, known to be one of the states that recognized the necessity of texting and driving. Damn it … Texting and driving will be considered illegal from September 1st, 2017 even in Texas. Here goes our freedom of texting and driving, multitasking, and being so cool.

This post describes a few ways of how we, the cool tech-savvy community, may survive this disaster of texting & driving ban. All the following methods can be applied hands-free. Therefore, their use should be legal. However, we strongly suggest that users consult a lawyer before implementing these methods. The authors of this post do not guarantee any safety or legal consequences of the methods.

All the following methods have one feature in common — you will have limited capability of typing. You will only be reading your incoming text messages safely. It is strongly recommended that you pull over if you need to type a message. However, you may type a few words without pulling over if you feel that no law enforcement officer is around, but again, the risk is all yours.

Driver-head mounts for smart phones

Driver-head mount for smart phones. This mount is only for smart phones, not for tablets.

Driver-head mount is a simple sophisticated device designed to attach a smartphone with the head of the driver. The phone is tightly mounted on a synthetic rubber stand, which is strongly attached to a head-band as illustrated in the figure. Although it is possible to mount tablets with this stand, we strongly recommended that only smartphones be used while driving. Tablets may increase the risk by obstructing the street-view even though we know that many people can drive fine without having a direct view of the road. It is alright to mount tablets, including iPad and Galaxy Tabs, while jogging or walking.

Cons: Users may experience headache after using the mount on their head for an extended period of time. We are sure that scientists will discover the optimal number of hours one may keep the device attached to the head without any health issues, when the device will be commercially produced.

Another drawback of this mount is that it may be difficult to type text messages while driving. The headband may become loose when typing a text message, especially when driving at a high speed.

Smart steering wheel—phone mounting device

Steering-wheel phone mount is a technology that places the phone on the steering wheel, which is the closest to where people keep their phones for traditional texting & driving. Smart steering wheel mounting keeps the street-view unobstructed. It will let the user text and drive with an ease, without any necessity of taking the arms off the wheel.

Smart steering wheel-phone mount. Allows to keep the phone closer to fingertips.

Cons: Compared to the other approaches, the number of risk-factors of texting and driving seem to be lesser with the smart steering wheel—phone mounting device. Inefficient texters may complain about the steering wheel mounts but such texters complain about any kind of texting and driving. Therefore, disregarding their complains will be the best policy to support the Renaissance of texting and driving.

Rearview mount for smart phones

Rearview mount is a sophisticated device that may carry both cell phones and tablets. The owner will mount the gadget with the sturdy mount, which will be attached to the rearview mirror. The following sketch demonstrates this elegant solution to the texting and driving ban problem.

Rearview mount. An elegant solution for clear text message view and possible texting (when allowed). Suitable for both smart phones and tablets.

Cons: Inefficient texters may report difficulty in typing text messages while driving at a high speed. We are pretty sure, even such inefficient texters will admit that the mount is great in using the smartphone as a GPS.

Windshield screen messenger on custom Tesla

Tesla is making full self-driving cars. If someone has a Tesla self-driving car, he/she may text and drive when the car is on self-driving mode. We are not sure if law would prohibit the driver from texting when the car is driving by itself because technically the human-driver is not the driver but the car is the driver when the car is on autopilot.

Anyway, we cannot afford a Tesla. Therefore, we are not much worried about it at this point. Yet, we have something more innovative than the previous ideas for Tesla-like smart cars. The idea is reflected in the following figure.

A windshield messenger-enabled custom smart car. The user can view the text messages on the windshield. It is not possible to type text messages but with smart voice active systems like Siri, it is possible to type without physically typing anything.

One may customize the windshield of a smart car before purchasing it. The windshield will be able to display all messages and notifications from the cellphone. This is something like the sci-fi movies where there are transparent glasses on which techy texts appear and blink. A self-driving capacity with this windshield screen messenger will be a perfect millennial combination. Typing on the windshield may sound a little inconvenient at first but it is possible to write text messages without typing by using a smart phone’s voice recognition software. 🙂

Cons: This technology will be expensive. We are not sure if Tesla will be willing to make such windshields either. Elon Musk is great. He might like the idea. If you are lucky, he might even install such windshields on the spaceship for manned Mars mission.

Motorcycle mounting device for texting and driving

We do not know if motorcyclists text when they drive. It sounds too risky. Anyway, our innovative ideas are not limited to regular four-wheel vehicles. The ideas cover motorcycles as well. Please take a look at the following picture that demonstrates how a motorcyclist may mount a cellphone on a two-wheeler.

Phone-mounting device for motorcycles. A flexible solution to help motorcyclists text while driving.

The cell phone will be mounted on the front side of the motorcycle. The stands should be flexible. The motorcyclist will be able to tilt the phone to the left or to the right to keep street-views unobstructed.

Cons: This mounting device is safe mostly for enjoying incoming text messages. While it is possible to send text messages with slightly increased risk, we recommend that the user avoids typing text messages. By the way, sending a text message is risky with our without a mounting device when driving a motorcycle. This implies that not being able to type a text message is not a limitation of this proposed mounting technology. Rather, it is the limitation of motorcycles.

Concluding remarks

Texting while driving is under no circumstances an acceptable activity. It risks the lives of others on the street who are relying on your driving skill, efficiency, and kindness.

Please notice that we have published this post under Awareness and Comedy and sarcasm categories. We observe people texting and driving almost everyday. Do you notice that many drivers are doing that? Please feel free to share any relevant experience in the comment section.

A Family Blog: Settle in El Paso

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134 thoughts on “How to text and drive

  1. Great article with sketches giving different unique ideas. Few times I have texted and drove, but keeping my eyes on the road is more important. Texting and driving will shift my focus off the road which is a dangerous thing. Most of the people do it but I find it dangerous.

    1. It is dangerous indeed. The post is just a funny article to discourage texting and driving.

      Thank you for visiting and commenting.

  2. I refuse to answer my phone while driving, let alone texting while driving! Multitasking isn’t among some of my top skills as it is hahaha

    1. Multitasking should no be an option for people that are driving for their own good, and for every single person they meet on the roads. That means it’s great that you never do this. The irony of this article is just really great that the sarcasm here is truly hilarious.

  3. I had a quick read of the comments and then realised that you were joking lol. I was scared for a bit. I’m not going to lie, the idea of the phone between your steering wheels kind of sounds decent. The only problem is that it is still a bit distracting but if you can use Siri or Google to speak what you want to reply then it could actually work 😉

    1. Haha … Yes, this is a satire post to raise awareness. Under no circumstances, texting and driving at the same time will be encouraged. Siri or Google is tempting. Even they are distracting. Thank you for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful day.

      1. I guess that instead of texting, people can wear Bluetooth headset and just call those people if it’s really important to contact them. If it’s not an emergency, then people can just reply later when they’re no longer driving. It’s thinking about what’s best for everyone.

  4. Hahaha. Nice artwork you got there. For me, whether there’s a technique on text and drive or not, It’s better not to do that because it’s not safe. Safe driving starts when you discipline yourself and focus on the road. Still a great artwork and presentation. LOL

      1. The satire of the article is not easily caught. The irony of the message of all these didn’t come to me easily but when I saw the graphics you have, it was too funny to take it seriously. You did a really good job making those.

  5. Nowadays, it is becoming common to drive in one hand and texting using the other hand. Whenever, I get to see this scenario, it really scares me.

    people are giving more value to attend a call, than their lives. It is not good. Government should create awareness regarding this issue.

    Thank you for the social awareness post!!

  6. I saw a lot of riders do texting while riding their motorcycle, they doing it with their phone in the left hand and the other hand in the handle bar. I ride a motorcycle as my primary way of transportation and I mounted my phone just like what I saw in the drawing above but a little lower. I answers text messages using voice command feature.
    I love the drawing in this blog. (n_n)

    1. I didn’t see this coming. I am not sure whether you are joking or not. We wrote this post to raise an awareness against text and drive.

      I am happy to know that you liked the pictures. The pictures in this post show what we shouldn’t do. Texting and driving is under no circumstances encouraged.

      Thank you for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful weekend.

    1. 🙂 I am happy tho know that there are laws in place in your country against texting and driving. Have a wonderful weekend.

  7. Lmfao! Here in Brazil, texting/answering the phone while driving represents the second most expressive cause of death at traffic. It became intrinsic to modern day men to use tech everywhere. While driving, you need full attention, you’re dealing not only with your life. Loved the humor tho! Cheers from Brazil.

  8. Well, even there is a law that about not to use your mobile device while driving, people are still doing it. Not all but I am talking in general. Just like me I’m doing this almost everyday. It’s actually a matter of self discipline or you just have to be extra careful using for device while driving on the road.

    1. I agree with you, it is necessary to be extra careful. We need to stop somewhere safe and then make any call or text, when absolutely necessary.

      Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful weekend ahead.

  9. In our country today, there is a recent law that was legalized that prevent drivers from using their smartphone and gadgets while driving and that includes texting. So now texting and others things are not allowed during driving.

    1. That is awesome! Safety must get the priority. In USA too, many states have banned the use of phones while driving. I hope, people will become cautious just too keep their family and others safe.

      Thank you for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful weekend ahead.

      1. Yes we need to be more careful especially while driving. If you want to use your smartphone, then don’t drive as simple as that. Safeness is more important than those people who texted you. Anyways thank you also.

  10. Texting while driving is definitely a serious concern that everyone needs to be aware of. In raising awareness however, it does not mean that we always have do it in a somber tone. At times, we should also do it like this- with humor. Doing so does not mean that we are making light of the issue or taking it as a joke, it is just another means through which we can pique the curiousity of other people and stimulate them to think. At first they would be like ” haha that’s funny” but after contemplating it for a while they would go “come to think it…” or ” that makes sense”.

    1. Exactly. Thank you for explaining. This is exactly what we tried to do in this post — use humor to raise awareness regarding NOT to text and drive at the same time. Thank you very much for visiting and commenting.

  11. I find it hilarious drving with a smartphone mounted on the drivers head. These methods even make sense to me. There is no problem if only drivers stop, text then drive. And may I add something, dont text while driving. A driver is so much prone to accident, so much more the danger of texting while driving. Thanks to this post for bringing this topic in light and positive way. I am happy to be part of this blogsite. Thanks!

    1. Thank you for contributing to this blog with your valuable comments. I completely agree with you. “Texting and driving” at the same time is a big big NO. Have a wonderful Thursday.

      1. Thank you too. I just read your reply now and I know you spend time to read comments on your blog and its wonderful. I hope your blog will become successful because it has the heart and feel of the family.

  12. Wow, this is an awesome tool and it will be of help to many people.At the same time, I must admit the fact that I like the new law the government are planning to enforce.It’s great because most of the time people behave anyhow and controlling them by enforcing a law is okay. “A place where there is no law, there is no sin”. I can recall driving the other day on a single lane and the car in front of me was moving slowly, It was really annoying.I don’t have any choice but to move at the same slow pace with it because there were only a single lane and no way to overtake.I was now wondering what could be going on with the driver inside, later I found out that she was just busy with her phone. And such case has led to one accident and another.

    1. I agree with you. Texting and driving is the most common cause of accidents nowadays. Under no circumstances people should text while driving.

  13. Amazing technologies. But driving and texting is a no for me especially with the con of having an headache after using it.This would be Amazing but some Cons should be worked on for improvement.

  14. I am literally laughing out lout over here at this! I bet something like this will hit the market soon. You better hurry and get your patent before someone else makes the millions!

    1. I happy to know that I was able to give a good laugh. I should write “patent pending” somewhere in this post. 🙂

      Thank you for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful weekend.

  15. Awesome post. so sad about the ban, better to send all the text i will be texting now before September comes around. LOL.
    But those are some really cool driving and texting solutions, although i doubt if you did be able to type much especially with your phone hanging on your rear view. but i think i like the smart steering mounting device better, looks like its the easiest to reach if the need arises.

    But one i will definitely not be trying out now or any time soon will be the motor cycle mounting device, come on, am not The Ghost Rider! am barely just finding my balance with the motor cycle and pulling out a skill like that might just not work out so well for me.

    1. Smart steering mounting device is a cool choice. 🙂 Even Ghost Rider may not dare to use the motor cycle mounting device.

      Thank you so much for your your hilarious comment on this post.

  16. Lol, the driver head mount is too funny! I can’t imagine myself using that device while driving. The steering wheel one is a great idea though. I hope it’s available in stores.

    In my place texting is not the only prohibited act while driving. They have banned the use off all handheld devices. That means you can’t even use your phone for navigation. They’ve also banned putting things in your dashboard. For example, we are not allowed to put phone mounts in the dashboard.

    I know that the want us to be safe, but the law should also be reasonable.

    1. That law might be a bit strict but I like it. All sorts of phone-related distractions are gone. Cars ? with navigation systems will become more popular.

      Thank you for visiting our blog and commenting. Have a wonderful week.

  17. I must say that I am glad is a law for this. Texting should be done when we are not driving. I saw a lot of accidents cause by the use of the phone when driving. Why should people die for this?

    1. I am absolutely with you on this. Texting is not worth that much. Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful day.

  18. Texting while driving is simply too dangerous. There isn’t any save way to do it. The only way for making it save is not doing it at all. Anyone and anything can wait a few minutes to get an answer. Life’s worth it.

    1. I agree to that! Driving and texting is too dangerous and I am even surprised why Texas just newly implemented the law. Avoiding them to text and drive. This should have been implemented a long time ago. But anyway some anything can really wait and it’s not even worth!!! So why take the risk?

      1. Better late than never. I think, there are also other states in the United States that haven’t yet completely banned texting and driving. Not sure why though. I agree with you — there is not reason to take the risk.

  19. Haha, when I initially saw the title of the post I thought ”what the hell” then I started reading and realized it’s all for humor purposes. Pretty clever! I am really happy that many countries finally banned the texting while driving… sadly, it is still allowed here. Our cars are not automatic though. The majority are driven using ”the stick” so we manually have to change gears… now imagine somebody texting, driving and trying to change the gears. Something bad is bound to happen. I don’t understand people that are glued to their phones nonstop. I am sure that replying to one text isn’t worth risking your life? Or is it?

    Either way, really entertaining way of presenting the dangerous texting and driving. Lovely pictures btw!

    1. I am glad that you liked the post. Definitely, replying to a text isn’t worth risking any life. Thank you for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful week.

  20. Hahaha. I initially thought this was for real! Enjoyed the humour though. Good post.
    The “Motorcycle mounting device for texting and driving” part was just funny. Imagine if this was approved by the law, then we all would have to build more hospital for treatment purposes and for psychiatric interventions.

    However, it is wrong to text and drive. Under no circumstance should a person engage in such. The dangers that comes with it is out-weighs the benefit. Funny enough, people still do this risking the lives of others on and off the road.

    1. Haha … definitely, more hospitals for “psychiatric interventions”. I agree with you completely — texting and driving is always wrong. Nothing good can come out of it. Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. Best regards.

  21. I almost decided to email this to all my Indian friends informing them that what they are doing now has the approval of a couple living abroad, until I saw your last comment. India is the worst when it comes to not following rules. I wish you came here and drove on our roads for first hand experience.

    *I am missing smilies here.

    1. I hope there will be a global awareness on this and one day people will stop jeopardizing lives. Thank you so much for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful weekend ahead.

  22. Good post! Everyone thinks they can text and drive safely until they get into an accident that’s their fault! It’s so easy to get trained to immediately look at your phone as soon as it makes a sound, or as soon as you *think* it makes a sound. Reminds me of a video I saw where driving instructors had kids try to text and drive during their test (on a safe, closed course!). They meant to teach the kids that it’s very hard to do safely, and that even when they’ve got more practice driving and they think they can do it, to remember that they really can’t!

    1. Absolutely, there is not work around for texting while driving. Thank you very much for visiting and commenting.

  23. Here I will key in to the necessity to establish that ban on drive texting. No matter how cool it is, text driving is totally wrong. Regardless of the techy methods listed in the post- although which makes text driving a bit tempting- yet it is not cool on term of safety. The could be distracting from the chat which could result in a serious accident. I totally agree with the government on this

    1. Haha. Definitely. Please note that this post is a satire post. We are raising awareness by using sarcasm. We made it clear at the the end of the post in the concluding remark. We completely agree with you. 🙂 Thank you for visiting and commenting. Have a wonderful day.

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